This week has been a down week for us, both physically and mentally. After the Bandera race Susan and I took a couple days to explore San Antonio, Texas, then moved further south to visit my father just outside Houston. While I needed some physical downtime post race I think the lack of mountains, sun, and movement has had a negative impact on my mood.
The first rule of depression is we don’t talk about depression. The second rule of depression is we don’t talk about depression. I’m a rule follower. I don’t make waves. I internalize my feelings, but only after denying them. I go to my cave. I distract myself. I self judge. I don’t ask for help. I didn’t talk about depression.